Stardate 65491.512:05 - Close to midnight, a frightening epidemic sweeps across the bar districts of DC. Crawling all over and out of the bars are the zombie versions of your friends. You try to contain them in cabs, buses, and metro stops to no avail. They stumble around ignoring crosswalk signals on major streets, displaying all ranges of emotions without reason or recollection why, and mingling and infecting other local bar hoppers. You try to scream but terror takes the sound before you make it. Without the phone number to Umbrella Corporation’s customer service line or voice, how are you supposed to bring your friends back to life? No worries, Focus Foxies, help is on the way. Rolling to a curb near you is your knight in shining armor: the Food Truck. These touring culinary saviors have the cure for drunken shenanigans: food!
Last Saturday, as we donned our classiest attire (Yes we
suited up!) and tried to match our behaviors to our wardrobe, I found myself in
such a zombie state. The cure for the common classy drunk munchies appeared in
the form of DC Slices. They serve New York style slices, and I had to have me a
pepperoni one. It was delightfully dripping in grease and covered in parmesan
cheese. Even more delightful were the two guys serving the slices. Yes, their
shirts say ‘He is Gay’ and ‘He is Not.’ Unneeded info, but entertaining to me
nonetheless. What else could this single-minded vixen ask for that night?
Chicago style pizza. Enough said.
As a safety tip from the Focus Fox Log, if you ever find
yourself in this position, go quickly to the nearest food establishment. For no
drunk mortal can resist the smell of greasy food.
In attendance: Current Knight in Shining Armor and Shenanigan Financier Focus Foxy Rob and soon to be Focus Foxies of Suck it Trebek!/Redditor
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